Adoption

I want to definitely write more on adoption at another time, but my grad school homework is waiting :(

So, I just wanted to quick share some great links with you:

Here is the post that got me thinking about adoption this morning. Because honestly? Josh and I were already talking about it last night. (No news or anything, just praying about future plans!). What I love most about this post is that Kelly discusses the multifaceted and challenging nature of adoption. As a member of a family that adopted (x2)and fosters (x a lot), I will witness to this. Adoption is a calling. Make no mistake of that. The post also links to a discussion of how we might better support families who adopt- so important

So, I happened over to a link Kelly posted from a family that is currently going through the international adoption process. She is selling these cute and meaningful shirts. And I love a good tank top (so hard to come by these days if you want to leave anything to the imagination!).

Then I clicked on a few more links, and somehow ended up here. I promise I am not usually this much of a procrastinator, but anything for this cause ;) The shirts say "love is waiting," and even though I typically buy a lot of our clothes secondhand (because I'm really cheap), I couldn't see any reason not too. It is clear my money is not going to fund big business or to line the pockets of some rich guy. This is going towards uniting pieces of a family. I can't think of a better way to spend my money.

Well, I probably have already spent more time on this than I should have already...more on this later.

Clarify

If you read my post from yesterday, don't be alarmed. I went back and made a few edits. I was trying not to edit in the hopes that it would be more honest and real, but it just came off harsh and...wrong.

Lesson learned.

I also wanted to clarify that I am not going to all of a sudden start writing only heavy, deep, difficult posts. In fact, one of the next ones I have planned is a craft tutorial. Random, I know. But I like crafts, and this is my blog, so there you go.

Maybe the focuslessness (totally just made that up) of this blog is just a reflection of life right now. Don't get me wrong, in many ways this is a really good time in life. But there have been so many changes it is often difficult to know where we are going. We have so many possibilities and opportunities right now, which is a huge blessing, but isn't necessarily helpful in providing focus or direction.

The only thing we know is we want to honor Jesus with our lives as long as He wills us to be on this earth.

Now we just wait for the details.

Short-Term Missions Trips

I just wanted to share a quick link with you- seriously, it will take like 5 minutes to read it. To be honest, I am afraid to even broach the subject, like I am afraid to discuss many. Our time in Namibia turned many of our preconceptions on our head. About giving. About serving. About Love. About evangelism. Most importantly, about God.

Up until this point, our lives since we got home have been about surviving, enduring transition, and clinging to Jesus as we re-integrate to this now-somewhat-foreign culture that used to feel like home. It doesn't anymore. Nowhere does completely (for more, check out this past post). And we are okay with that. It has been a really intense time, in so many ways, and we've sometimes struggled with being real and honest, when everyone wants a happy face and a positive report.

The most often-asked question we receive is [often with a wistful sigh] "Wasn't it amazing?" followed by close second in "I can't imagine the fun you had!"

I nod politely and mumble something about us being at peace that was where God wanted us at the time, but inside I am screaming:

"NO! Are you crazy? It was not fun! How can you think I could enjoy seeing people suffer from disease, death, poverty, hunger, abuse, spiritual lies, and things I could never even write here because most hearts can't handle it?????"

Yes, it was amazing- but not in the way they think. I think the best word to describe it is "satisfying."

My heart is forever broken by the things we experienced. Not that it's not joyful about so many triumphs, but my blissful ignorance was shattered. I have seen a greater hurt, one that only Jesus can heal- but don't read that too quickly. The important part is that Jesus CAN heal.

There is so much I want to say, and so much I need to process. Things that aren't necessarily fun or pretty or peaceful. Please take it all with a grain of salt.

He didn't teach us those hard lessons only for us to keep it to ourselves. If there is one thing we have discovered about our first time out, it's that he was laying foundation.

And that is truly the hardest, and most important part of building anything. I feel it. The weight and responsibility of it. The necessity of not forgetting. Needing to not waste even one moment. Just when I think I can't handle one more tiny bit of stress or change, it has come.
But He has been faithful, so faithful. More than I can ever articulate.

I know He has a brilliant and beautiful plan, one I can't fully see, yet. He is worthy of my trust.

I guess this post didn't exactly go as planned, but that's okay. It's pretty much analogous to life, huh? There will be more on short-term mission trips, and so much else. Please allow me to share with you on this journey.